I vs We

So this came up today during a conversation with some good folks that all play in the manufacturing and supply chain consulting world. I was asked a question about a gig at American Sugar Refining Inc from about a decade ago now, and I answered the question regarding what WE had done specifically to significantly improve American Sugar's production for a specific category. I answered the question and then it was pointed out to me that all the way through the entire conversation I kept saying WE.  

This is not the first time this specific thing has been pointed out to me. When I was at Wells Fargo I interviewed several times for promotions and they follow the STAR model very strictly. So much so that it became very difficult for me to move up as quickly as I could have because having a business discussion in a rigid format is inherently difficult for me, but to have that discussion knowing those scoring interviews were looking for my part in any example was utter gridlock for my brain.  

I vs We, or probably better stated We vs I, goes back as far as I can remember but very specifically has at its roots my father Anthony Michael Rocchio, or The Rock as he was known, and yes he was the original, long before Silvester Stalone's Rocky and WAY before The Rock of wrestling and movie fame.  

Anyway, when I was a kid I simply couldn't wait until I was a freshman in high school so I could finally play football for my father. So much so that I held my own little "holdout" before NFL free agency made it popular, and basically made it impossible for my parents to do anything other than let me move in with my father before I entered eighth grade. This gave me a year of being around him and his team before becoming a captain of our freshman football team the next year.  

I learned almost immediately the I vs We lesson as I was so excited during three-a-days that first August to be playing football and to be a captain of our freshman group that I went out and bought maroon electrical tape to put stripes on all the helmets of my freshman teammates. They of course thought it really cool as well!! Not only did it look cool, but it was our own little thing we had over the upperclassman...or so I thought.  

We go out to practice with our new shiny maroon stripes, one on each side of the one-inch ridge that ran straight down the middle of our helmets, and it took Pops all of fifteen seconds to notice something was up, and about fifteen more seconds to figure out exactly what was different, with whom, and most likely who was responsible. He let it go for almost the entirety of practice and then had a little surprise for our entire freshman team. We ran for about the entire remainder of August, or so it felt. I know with certainty that it was getting dark as we wrapped up and that my freshman teammates were a little less than pleased with me.  

That night the conversation was simple, and the foundation for a principle I have used with every team I have ever coached ever since was laid in brick and concrete, “everything we do we do as a team!!” I don’t know how many times I have said that in my coaching lifetime, but it is many, and it has served me well as a coach.  

The other part of the message that maybe took a bit more to develop, but one that I believe with all my heart, is that none of us, not Steve Jobs, or Mark Zuckerberg, or Bill Gates, or any other incredibly successful, wealthy CEO, athlete, movie star, director, and so on, ever achieved any of what they did ON THEIR OWN. And, no I am not writing this tonight because most of these guys are up the road in Sun Valley this weekend, the timing just happens to work out pretty well.  

I know for certain that as many ups and downs and crazy turns that my life has taken, I have had successes along the way, and none of them were solely because of me, and especially not because of any amazing original thought I had. I have learned a great deal from a great many people along the way, beginning with that lesson on a football field behind Hanover High School in August of 1977. There have been many coaches, teammates, colleagues, mentors, and I have “stolen” from all of them along the way and repackaged for whatever purpose was in front of us. One of them whom I respect a great deal for his knowledge, intellect, and success in both business and academics, pointed out to me once that my particular talent is actually being able to be in a room full of people such as this, listen to what they have to say, take their input and that of rest of whatever particular group and distill it down to a digestible client deliverable. Even then I am not really sure where that ability comes from or who I learned it from, for me it is just the inevitable result of a bunch of smart people working together towards a common goal.  

In short, “WE” will get you a great deal more over a number of years and/or decades than “I,” and probably more importantly, people are far more willing to work with/for someone that is always focused on WE.  

Thanks for listening :)